What do you wish to be when you grow up?? 

I’ll be 19 this august and I still haven’t figured that question out. I’m studying for a law degree and in my final year but I’m pretty sure I might not earn a living as a lawyer afterwards. You might ask, Why am I wasting my time and studying law then?? Well here’s the story behind it. People used to look at me and say ‘hmm, this one would be a good lawyer’. I was a quiet kid and used to wonder why they said that but nevertheless, I went along with it. I didn’t have a passion so who cares anyway. Whenever I came back from school, I did my homework then went to the saloon. Not to make my hair, but just to watch. I was fascinated by it. Before I turned eight I knew how to plait inner weaving, twist and do normal braids. I always did my homework because I didn’t want my elder sister to come look for me & send me back home because of it. I also used to watch a lot of TV in the saloon. One day, we had a rehearsal in my school for a drama that was to be performed the next day. The lead actress was my friend and she kept getting it wrong then I corrected her. I did that just once and unknown to me, the director of the play was standing behind and saw me act. He gave me the role once I was done. The happiness I felt that day is just unexplainable. 

We moved from Lagos to Port Harcourt and I started my secondary school, Still with the dream of becoming a lawyer someday. I got into my senior secondary school and chose arts. In my arts class 80% of the students wanted to become lawyers as well. This irritated me. I’m not into following the crowd. I love being unique. I wanted to be unique, so I resolved that since everyone was trying to become a lawyer I’ll do something else, so I chose political science. Nobody wanted that, they felt law was higher. I was cool with it and decided to become an ambassador #big woman tins. In school, i was in three societies,the debate society, drama club, and choral society. I sucked at debate but still stayed and kept pushing for reasons unknown to me, Choral society had a really cute piano man and I’m a sucker for cute boys, drama club gave me life: I loved to perform, I loved every second I spent in that room and always looked forward to school over just so we start our meetings. I got praised for my acting skills way too many times than i can recall. So I decided to become an actress, told my father about it and he threatened to disown me the day he sees me on a TV screen. I said Bye-bye to my acting dream after that but kept attending the club. He couldn’t come to my school and drag me out of the class anyways, so I enjoyed it while it lasted. 

One afternoon, on our way back from an outing we drove past a military academy (not sure which). I liked the way they matched and their uniform so i told my dad I wanted to become a police officer lol. The man stopped the car and told me to say it one more time then see if he won’t throw me off the bridge. I just jejely kept quiet till we got home. My mum and siblings had a good laugh and still laugh about it till today.  

Well in my SS2 I changed schools and in my new school someone stole my ambition. My teacher asked us in class what our future aspirations were, as usual people said boring law and I said political science. Then this girl heard the course & answered with same. I started crying; because honestly I was tired. I wanted it to be just mine and didn’t want to share a career. She had fun with the fact that I flipped that day. Fast forward to another day, a different teacher asked the same question. So just to be sure that what she did last time was intentional, I modified the name of the course. Political science and international relations, I answered. The same girl repeated my answer lol. I turned to her direction and smiled. Later on, she asked me why I didn’t cry but I ignored her. This time around I had confidence in myself and knew I was greater than her in all ramifications. I was way more intelligent and scored higher in class so I couldn’t be bothered. I wasn’t the best, but she definitely wasn’t on my level. She always took last position in class so at this point I couldn’t be bothered because I knew the only way she would make it into a university was if she ‘sorted’it out. And true to it, that’s what she did when the time came. 

Back to my story, I wrote jamb and in my form I filled political science and international relations, University of Abuja. After passing, my mum changed my school and course of study without talking to me first. It was after doing it she informed me. I was so angry at her and cried that night. Well, she told me if I wasn’t okay with it, I can wait till next year then write another jamb and go to the school of my choice. She then convinced me that it wasn’t that bad, after all I have been dreaming of being a lawyer since I was a kid. I guess she was scared of me going to Abuja and becoming a runs girl. My university is in the same state so she can keep an eye on me. P.s, I’ve  lived at home since my year 1. Why did I write this long chronicle though?? Basically, I’m just pulling through. I’m not saying this because my GPA is low or I’m not cut out to be a lawyer or law books don’t interest me. I love the law, its fascinating. There is an exception to every rule & as a woman that’s easy to understand. I’m even doing internship, just in case. So far, I’ve involved myself in several businesses so I find out what I truly love & I’ve not had much luck. I’ve tried sewing, computer classes, e.t.c but nah. Right now it’s catering and God help me lol. I’m yet to find my way and I know there are a lot of people out there like me. Some are even in their thirties and older with a job. A well paying one but still not fulfilled. If you have figured it out then you are truly lucky. Nevertheless, to people like me who are yet to figure it out, occupy your time by doing something tangible till you figure it out. 

I read a lot of  memos saying if u don’t have a dream then you are a poor man. My bank account doesn’t say that so I’m not paying attention to them. I’ll find myself at the right time but till then, I’m partying and praying.

Have a blessed Wednesday. 


4 Comments Add yours

  1. sparkledawn says:

    That’s great that you are studying Law, it will be I’m sure an interesting and fulfilling career. Plus, should you ever decide in the future to do some acting, singing etc, you’ll always have a good career to fall back on.


    1. Zortura says:

      Thanks sparkle. To think you took the time to read it. God bless you 😊😊

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Loved this post! I feel exactly the same… I’m 19 too and can’t figure it out. Carry on writing, your blog is great! X


    1. Zortura says:

      Thank you darling


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